Photo by Ivan Samkov
Regardless of the loss you went or are going through, the grieving process is valid. However, understanding the levels of grief, there might be healthier ways to deal with loss.
First, you need to have explicit knowledge of what grief or loss is. They go hand-in-hand when a person feels that something or someone important is taken away from them. Depending on the circumstances, a person may feel too much from the loss and have difficulty coping or recovering. Many emotions are handled simultaneously without being given ample time to feel the firsthand loss.
When you’re processing grief, you may encounter the following emotions:
- Shock
- Anger
- Denial
- Guilt
- Deep sadness
- Depression
- Numbness
A person may feel all of them simultaneously or often go through each one in stages.
Understanding the Root Cause
When confronted with losing something or someone, it’s a known fact that it takes time to sink into our brains that the loss happened. We tend to process it step-by-step due to our bodies’ capacity to handle such distress. That is truly one of life’s significant challenges that some people, unfortunately, do not address pretty well.
Here are some common reasons why a person is grieving. Knowing and understanding these reasons will help us gauge how to deal with them if they happen to us or someone close in our lives:
- Broken relationships
- Illnesses
- Death of a loved one or pet
- Financial loss
- Loss of a dream
- Trauma from an incident
- Giving up an aspiration/dream
These circumstances might have shaped a person’s worldview; losing either will alter their lives considerably. It might be a bit good or severe, but the outcome will only be determined by how the victim of such loss deals with them once they happen. The most probable thing to do is to seek help from the safest support system, be around people who can relate to the grief, and help let go of the overwhelming emotions swirling up inside.
The personal journeys of DeLorenzo help us learn how to still attain hope, love, and peace despite the grief because we all need a point of reference to help us redirect to the right path before any of us dive too deep wallowing in sorrow forever.
The Misconceptions Around Loss
We must defeat a few ideas about how people should go about the loss they experienced, especially the ones we think are what we can relate to. Loss is handled differently by individuals, so there isn’t a sure way to deal with it, nor is there an unspoken standard for coping with it.
Time is essential when processing healing, but that doesn’t mean that there’s a deadline. Even if we seem lively on the outside, we might feel dead on the inside because we have to carry the weight and pretend that things are alright. It’s sad that we can’t solely focus on healing from a loss all the time.
It’s not entirely true that the pain goes away if we choose to ignore it. That nurtures the hurt, and preventing it from emerging will affect everything around us eventually. It’s a must to face the pain and take action rather than letting it rest.
Another misconception is that people who don’t cry over a loss aren’t affected. Even if shedding tears are a typical sign that the person feels grief, that doesn’t mean the ones who didn’t are apathetic. They have other ways of dealing with the hurt but still, feel the same amount or even more than what others realize.
Grieving has a particular timeline. That is not true at all. When a person feels the loss, there is no definite due date when they should stop. We need to realize that depending on the degree of pain, some people carry it with them forever; they just got used to the weight. Grief from a loss doesn’t have a specific timetable.
What Can You Do to Deal With Loss?
We often tell ourselves that “it’s fine” or ‘it’ll go away,” but in the back of our minds, there’s that underlying uncertainty. So how should one deal with loss?
- Recognizing the pain that is felt
- Taking note of the emotional triggers
- Acknowledging that grief comes differently to everyone
- Have a support system that is proactive and solid
- Taking care of oneself mentally, emotionally and physically
- Looking for new distractions to keep the mind and heart busy
Looking for references on coping might give more in-depth solutions on how to weather through the storms in life. Whether alone or not in this broken journey, we can always find ways to shed light on ourselves and other people if only we take our time absorbing the loss, feeling the grief, getting up while brushing off our knees, and facing the pain head-on.
