Friendships are an integral part of the growing-up phase, although it is also one of the phases that many adults especially struggle with. Social anxiety and the lack of opportunities to meet people can hinder meeting new people. Still, friends significantly impact our health and well-being as they help relieve stress and negative emotions and provide the companionships and happiness one may seek after.
It takes plenty of time and effort to help kids create and maintain relationships due to a lack of social skills, but it is never too late to learn about friendship and make new friends. Whatever their age, they may produce healthy and strong relationships and foster these friendships into partnerships that may last for a very long time.
1. Read books about friendship.
Children’s books attempt to portray examples of and traits of a solid and healthy friendship. Books from opportunities to talk about good manners, social skills, and the qualities of the characters children should embody.
Good suggestions for kids to read include Rosella Calauti and her book “Friends Here…There… Everywhere!!!”, “Winnie the Pooh” and “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Kids.” Make sure to read books about friends with different traits to introduce to kids how to maintain friendships despite their vast differences.
2. Build conversation skills
The most critical skills needed for creating relationships are conversational skills. Kids need to learn how to communicate effectively, introduce themselves to strangers, and maintain their conversations until they are independently capable of doing so. They also need to understand how to listen to others to understand and empathize with them actively. A 2013 study dictates that modeling good relationships and creating healthy conversations can help kids form essential communication skills.
3. Model on how to become a good friend
One of the most surprising traits of children is their ability to absorb information like sponges. Around their very early stages of childhood, they learn how to treat people based on the observation of their parents.
If their parents treat friends with love and respect, the child will most likely do the same, but if the parents are rude and dishonest to peers or other people, the child will think that this is the best way to treat somebody and emulate this behavior. To combat this, engage in role-playing exercises with the child. The act of roleplaying can help kids practice what to do in these scenarios and how to deal with surprising and awkward activities while socializing.
4. Encourage children to be understanding and forgiving of mistakes.
Although kids may naturally forgive people, other kids may be hostile and antagonize peers and strangers. Others may engage in self-criticism, self-loathing, and extreme doubt in themselves, so adults and parents should teach compassion and forgiveness towards themselves and others. Examples of this include reframing the child’s viewpoint or asking the child to give the benefit of the doubt and teaching them to say “sorry,” or teaching them to acknowledge mistakes and self-love.
5. Find ways to meet new peers and monitor their social life
Teach children how to step forward and take the initiative to start and make friends as this will serve them well in the future, especially in adult life.
Introduce the kids to strangers or let them do activities of interest such as tennis or soccer matches, activity clubs, dance or music lessons, and even volunteer opportunities such as homeless shelters and a food pantry. As long as it is an activity your child enjoys, they can find happiness in their memories and form deep-lasting bonds with others.
