A friend made a gift for me once, and has really stuck in my memory. It was a birthday gift of a shadow box that showed me as the minister at her wedding. Within the box was a photograph of me wearing my “uniform,” a Halloween costume fitting for the theme! There were drawings by her that conveyed what the role I filled meant to her. There were symbols of things I love. It was beautiful and so special to receive, to feel it, study it. The gift sent a strong message of gratitude, connection, and value. That gift said much more than just thank you! It conveyed so many MESSAGES.
The gift completely blew me away and so emphasized the event. I could see so much of her appreciation, and it earmarked for me that making someone a gift conveys so much. I am sure you’ve had the experience of receiving a handmade or carefully selected gift. It almost can’t miss conveying great messages. One might be showing how well you (the giver) knows the receiver. Let’s say the gift was a painting done by a friend of a place experienced by both the giver and the receiver, together.
The message this particular gift might convey could be “I will never forget seeing this place with you,” or “I remember how taken you were with this view, and I wanted you to know I heard you!,” or “It is always so special to be with you in beautiful places.”
It wouldn’t even have to be a painting. A photograph or a selfie with a personal message could create the same aura. And certainly this example is only one of a long list of possibilities. My message in this blog is more about the personal gift and how it delivers a message.
Communicating through careful gift selection can mark special compliments to a relationship. It acknowledges how well the receiver is valued or known, or some other earmark. So, why such a special effort? My comment or answer might be, “Why not? The more we convey to someone their uniqueness, their statement, their essence; the more we manage to illustrate strong feelings of admiration or respect. This bonds us to each other. Not only that, but it elevates self-respect, the joy of communion, confidence, and knowing.
What I have witnessed myself, is the more I elevate another, the more community or relationship I create, the more I enhance someone’s joy and the more I punctuate our relationship! This is profound! Communication is Divine work. When it is positive, it builds renewal and a feeling of love. It also builds beautiful trust!
I’ll offer one more example from my life. My granddaughter, Ava, and I went to a variety store. I gave her a $20.00 bill and said, “Ava go shopping for a gift for me! In the meantime I am going to take a $20.00 bill and shop for you. I think we’ll know when each of us is done.
Ava was 12. She went out and scoped the shelves with zest. I did the same. Her investigation produced other things and a 5” fake rock with “LOVE’ carved into its surface. No it was not hand carved! That did not matter!!! I have that rock to this day on my altar and Ava is now 12 years older, and in college. I love that rock! And that rock is often what I take to group meditations where the instruction has been to bring “something of value” for the altar. Ava knows I still have it and giggles that it is the token that goes with me to such an event. She calls it “that funny little rock.”
Along with this concept I would emphasize the importance of great integrity. I have witnessed insincere flattery as you have. Let’s instead elevate this form of communication to a place of deep presence and respect. And not only that but rededicate our selves to very deep gift-giving. Not always, but often! Myself, I am going to see it as an opportunity. It makes me excited about my next chance to bestow a gift! Happy gift giving!
By the author of MESSAGES, FLOWING WITH SYNCHRONICITY